Shinobi Life Online

General Category => General Discussion => Topic started by: Fraudulent on April 19, 2017, 22:53:51

Title: Chapter 6 - Subject 0035
Post by: Fraudulent on April 19, 2017, 22:53:51
Caged in by steel walls that appeared to lack sunlight, Kimoto rested like a ragdoll, nailed to a wooden pole by his hands in the center of the room.

Five hundred… and twelve

His torso had pieces of flesh torn out and blood was strewn beneath him in aimless splatters.

A shockwave thrust his body backwards as a mace-like weapon drew contact once more.

Blood poured out from his mouth and drooled down his chest as he grunted.

Five hundred… and thirteen

His head was covered by a straw sack, and the only clothing he wore was the underwear beneath his blood stained trousers.

A bucket of cold water sat next to the pole, waiting to be used.

 “Hold it” a flat, soft voice commanded from the distance.

The crackling of wood and scraping of metal filled the empty room as the mace was dropped without a second thought.

Footsteps crept towards Kimoto in an unsettling motion as blood continued to drip. They were not ordinary footsteps – they were the footsteps of an intruder on broad heels.

The cover was swiftly plucked off, unveiling Kimoto’s lifeless, slouched head.

His energy had depleted to the point where keeping himself steady and upright was a major struggle – he was drained.
“Your endurance is impressive.” the soothing voice glided through Kimoto’s mind as a cold, smooth hand gripped onto his jaw, slowly lifting his face in vision of his own.

The figure that stood before Kimoto manifested the appearance of a tall and elegant man in his mid-twenties, dressed in a red velvet suit and a black shirt with a black tie wrapped around the collar.

He bent down, almost crouching, his hand still firm on Kimoto’s face.

A few rapid chuckles escaped through his nose as he cocked his head to the right, bringing himself a few inches closer to the pinned target.

His sharp cheekbones emphasized the long, pasty face that was home to a sinister and amused smirk that had developed over time.

“I have an offer for you.”

Kimoto ignored him as his weary eyes slowly shifted around in order to examine the environment he was trapped in.

A statue of Buddha…

The large, golden figure of the religious deity ranked high above everything else a few meters away, accompanied by countless broken skulls and bones, on and around it.

“What the fuck…?” Kimoto muttered under his breath in confusion and disgust.

“Aah! I see you’ve noticed my statue!” he lit up with excitement.

Kimoto continued his visual patrol for a few more seconds.

The only source of light were the large, half melted candles that had been strategically set out around the dome.

In the far end where the room was darkest, a box with a wooden stand rested and was surrounded by more candles, this time they were red and untouched. The whole structure had a grey cloak covering it.

A memorial, huh? Kimoto questioned himself.

 “What do you think of my aesthetics?” He brought Kimoto back into focus, finally releasing his grip.

Kimoto’s head slumped down once again, the last few drops of blood on his chest forcedly hitting the ground.
“The pain…” he whispered with closed eyes.

He was becoming numb to the torture due to the physical and mental repetition, his mind growing more and more blank.

The suited man stood up and wiped his hand with a handkerchief.

He paused and stared down at the helpless victim.

“Pain? – You don’t understand pain well enough to mention it so vainly”

“Your wounds will heal with time, my mental scars have been permanently engraved to my soul” He assured the prisoner.

Kimoto had already given up on escape and life, and took careless steps.

“What do you know about pain?” He resumed the dialogue.

The man paused in disbelief and adjusted his body language directly towards the younger.

“Pain”

“When the person who was your paradise lived happily with you knowing what you were beneath the mask disappears forever” his soft voice growing louder

“When the only person to see beyond your appearance has their soul taken by gang scum like yourself!” he gripped Kimoto’s entire face with his left hand before delivering a critical blow to the chest with his right fist.

The boy managed to share a painful grunt before the hit penetrated through the wooden pole, sending him flying backwards onto the ground with dozens of wooden pieces scattered next to him.

“And all those countless times I’ve tried leaving this Earth forcefully to follow her into the afterlife?!”

He tugged onto his shirt, ripping it off with one swing and revealing deep scars from neck to abdomen. They looked perfect in size for Katana blades. The figures '0035' were marked on his chest.

“But I cannot die!”



 




Title: Re: Chapter 6 - Subject 0035
Post by: sirpaul on April 19, 2017, 23:26:48
ew
Title: Re: Chapter 6 - Subject 0035
Post by: Diamond Lee on April 20, 2017, 00:09:04
vregy good chapter

Writing was very good


Gib more gore
Title: Re: Chapter 6 - Subject 0035
Post by: Fraudulent on April 20, 2017, 00:34:21
ew
(http://2static3.fjcdn.com/comments/6093049+_08e62bed5e4b13f0939ffa1583c313cf.jpg)

vregy good chapter

Writing was very good


Gib more gore
Thanks, and yeah, I kinda took a new approach towards different style of writing. It really stands out in this chapter if you compare it to my previous ones. I guess I'll continue like this and make future chapters more "realistic" and sinister?
Title: Re: Chapter 6 - Subject 0035
Post by: Manuster on April 20, 2017, 02:35:44
o shit (waddup)

Skenglord is evolving

cOngratewlashions, your Skenglord has evolved into SnoopSpeare

SnoopSpeare - The SnoopSpeare draws its roots from both Shakespeare and Spears, larger, shankier versions of skengs



rip idk where im gonig with this lmaao i like it, it's different, not what I'd do but it's good, an improvement too
Title: Re: Chapter 6 - Subject 0035
Post by: Toratsume Nyshn on April 20, 2017, 03:27:26
OH BOII...
Kimoto man :( feelsbadman :(
Pain is real
good job
Title: Re: Chapter 6 - Subject 0035
Post by: taigakun on April 20, 2017, 09:40:31
Wow this was lit. Liked it a lot
Good job Snoop
Title: Re: Chapter 6 - Subject 0035
Post by: StriderOtaku on April 20, 2017, 11:47:46
Manuster, please, this is better than you can do.
@Snoopy I felt like I was watching a live-action series episode, it was quite immersive. I'd like to know more about this '0035' and that rarely happens.Thank you.
Title: Re: Chapter 6 - Subject 0035
Post by: Fraudulent on April 20, 2017, 17:07:35
o shit (waddup)

Skenglord is evolving

cOngratewlashions, your Skenglord has evolved into SnoopSpeare

SnoopSpeare - The SnoopSpeare draws its roots from both Shakespeare and Spears, larger, shankier versions of skengs



rip idk where im gonig with this lmaao i like it, it's different, not what I'd do but it's good, an improvement too
SnoopSpeare lmfao, and thanks!

OH BOII...
Kimoto man :( feelsbadman :(
Pain is real
good job
Thank you!

Wow this was lit. Liked it a lot
Good job Snoop
I'm glad you liked it :)

Manuster, please, this is better than you can do.
@Snoopy I felt like I was watching a live-action series episode, it was quite immersive. I'd like to know more about this '0035' and that rarely happens.Thank you.
You will find out more about him soon :p